Why Live 1.15

1.15 I Reject Your Unhealed Pain

Dear person who hurt me,

I get it. I really do. Actually better than you do.

My pain is valid in my reaction to your treatment of me but you don’t understand that.

It seems as if all you can see is how to protect yourself from taking accountable steps to heal yourself.

You hurt me because you were hurting. But you don’t seem to see that.

When I tell you to respect me, you accuse me of being disrespectful. 

Are you tired of seeing everything and everyone else as the causes of your emotional roller coaster?

Would you like to get off the ride and learn how to live in peace with your reality?

It seems to me that you would. And I’d like to help, I really would! But you have already labeled me as The Enemy so everything I say is walled off from your heart.

I reject your unhealed pain as my own because it is not.

My joy will not sink equal to your pain. And that doesn’t make me a heartless person incapable of empathy.

I do have empathy for your current inner struggle. I’ve been there! But I now have the gift of wisdom and self accountability  for my pain.

My pain is mine, no one else’s. Just as I hope you one day learn the wisdom that your pain is yours. No amount of my pain can ever ease your pain.

I’m sorry that we can not seem to find a common ground to see just how much we love one another.

Insecurities and walls seem to play ping pong with our good intentions.

Are we broken? And if so, how can we find value in our brokenness?

Because I still see your value. I honor your journey and I want our love to be the foundation of our futures.

Maybe it’ abuse for you to keep expressing your pain. Maybe it’s a lack of self worth that I stay.

I’m not sure.

I’m confused.

No matter how much I grow, it seems that you are determined to stay where you say you are miserable.

All my life, I’ve heard you say that you are doing the best you can. Really?

Is the best you can do is to avoid the truth? I guess I believe in you more than you believe in yourself. 

Because I see an amazing person who is strong and capable. How can I get you to see your worth like I see it?

You’re worth peace of mind.

You’re worth loving yourself. 

You’re worth quality connections with healthy people.

Who hurt you? Who gave you an experience where you internalized that you should scared to love yourself?

Who made you choose them over yourself? So that now you always choose your pain as your identity instead of the amazing ability you have to explore and experience. 

I reject your unhealed pain because I reject that self protection is who you are.

Self protection is a skill to use in certain situations but it is not a whole person. It can never identity an entire being.

I will hold you to the magnificence that I see behind the self protection.

You will always be allowed to love your worth when you are with me. And I will continue to be a graceful example of how to peacefully reject unhealed pain for the journey of healing.

For I know firsthand the confusion, the tremendous amount of energy, and the uncertainty of that journey.

It’s a lot to deal with, I get it.

But please, have confidence in your ability to endure the journey and come through it with a renewed faith in your worth.

Someone else said you had less worth and somewhere along the line you agreed with them.

It’s time to stop agreeing. It’s time to reject their poor evaluation skills and to step into the magnificence that I know you are.